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Blaaag

Sleeping Through the Party

I can't believe we overslept! Where's my monocle?
I can't believe we overslept! Where's my monocle?

Alpaca! Wake up! We overslept and it’s past eight o’clock!

Hmm… what? I’m going to snooze for a few more minutes. Don’t worry, I won’t miss the school bus.

Oh that’s just great. Thanks to Dizzy, I’m not dressed in my formal attire, Alpaca is barely conscious, and we’re late for the party! That fuzz for brains sheep has been wildly changing the clocks, believing for some reason that we needed to be prepared for the new Dizzy Deal time.

First he moved them back four hours and woke everyone up at midnight. Then he realized that was no good because the clocks would say 4:00 at 8:00, so he moved them back another four hours. That way they would read 12:00 at 8:00, somehow thinking it made more sense because the deal normally changes when the clock says 12:00.

It gets better though. He didn't tell anyone he was changing anything! He snuck around like some mysterious, meddlesome time fairy, here to make you think you're crazy when you start nodding off at two o'clock in the afternoon.

The result? Alpaca and I had no idea what time it was last night and stayed up all night thinking it was earlier in the day. We thought we had better nap if there was any chance of staying awake tonight.

So Happy New Year’s Eve from an under-dressed gargoyle and an unconscious alpaca!



Good Morning?

Remind me to never ask you to wake me up. Ever.
Remind me to never ask you to wake me up. Ever.

Three… two… one…

BEEEEP BEEEEP BEEEEP! CRASH! WAKE UP FRED! CRASH!

AAAAHH! My secret lair is under attack! Arm the defense systems! ARM THE DEFENSE SYST- Oh. I was dreaming. DIZZY! For the love of all that is fuzzy, what are you doing waking me up at… eight o’clock?

Didn’t you get the memo?

Yes.

Good! Then you know that in a dramatic tipping of the hourglass, and for the promotion of healthy sleeping habits, Dizzy Management has decided to switch the Dizzy Deal at 8:00pm Eastern time, starting on December 31st.

Yes, I know. I read the memo. There is nothing healthy about the way you just woke me up. Is that clock right?

I decided we should do a practice run. So I’ve changed all of the clocks back four hours and set alarms so we can practice getting up at eight o’clock instead of midnight.

Dizzy, that makes absolutely no sense.

Sure it does! It’s eight o’clock somewhere right now, and you just woke up. One more night ought to do the trick and you’ll be ready for the change on Tuesday. No need to thank me, just helping out.

I… you… I don’t even know where to begin with how ridiculous that is. Not to mention eight o’clock is earlier, why would I even be sleeping? Dizzy, do you really think I go to bed before eight o’clock at night?

You must, because you were sleeping now.

THAT’S BECAUSE IT’S MIDNIGHT NOW!

No, it’s clearly eight o’clock. We went over this.

Didn’t I send you to Canada? That wasn’t far enough. Get in that box over there, you’re going to Antarctica!


Afro-tastic!

If you thought wearing yarn on your head ended in 2008, think again!
If you thought wearing yarn on your head ended in 2008, think again!

[We continue our trip down memory lane. It seems that there were many hair stories; this one is from January 24, 2009.]

 

Now you can have your afro and knit it too!  The latest and greatest trend is of course Filatura Di Crosa Curly and Dizzy is pulling it off in style...

Good for sweaters, throws, or creating a thick and colorful fro that's bigger than your entire body!

Why would you want a big, puffy hair-do that large?  Aside from keeping you warm and adding a generous splash of color to the bleak, white, snowy frozen north - think of what you could stash up there!  Dizzy has an entire lunch, files on the next 3 deals, a craft bag full of projects and a cup of coffee tucked away in that colorful, curly pile of disco fever.

So don't sweat those curls you've always wanted for another second...  and also don't tell Dizzy that the glue on that peace sign sticker is way stickier than we originally thought and won't be fun to remove!


A Dizzy Dilemma...

Perhaps Dizzy has gained weight over the years.
Perhaps Dizzy has gained weight over the years.

[We continue our trip down memory lane with the first official story from December 1, 2008.]

Baa Baa Dizzy Sheep... Have you any wool?

Yes sir!  Yes sir!  Three bags, the storage room, the basement, the dame's barn and umm, the little boy down the lane's... house... full?

Wait - ONE for the...  the little boy's WHOLE house??

Yeah, production has been unusually high sir.

That MUST be a fire hazard...  Hmm, I knew giving sheep an espresso maker was a bad idea!  Dizzy, what are we going to do with all of this wool??  This pile of Adrienne Vittadini Nadia is blocking the kitchen!

We could have a knit party?

A knit party??  I don't know any knitters who can get me into my kitchen by dinner time.  No, we need to get rid of all this with a great deal!

Do we get to keep the espresso maker at least??

I don't know...

Come on, I'll make you a laAAAtte!


Yesterday's Haiku

Yesterday's Haiku
Yesterday's Haiku

[This is your nameless, never seen narrator.  Since Dizzy was boxed up and shipped to Canada yesterday, we are going to end the year with a nostalgic look back at some of our favorite stories.

The pre-launch story that started it all, from November 30, 2008:]

 

Deal of yesterday,

Like the wind you can't be bought,

You smile from the blaaag...


To Ship or Not to Ship? Tis Not the Question!

Pardon me folks, I have to ship this package.
Pardon me folks, I have to ship this package.

What’s inside the package, you may ask.

Let’s just say that a certain sheep was very tired from the Twelve Days.

And let’s just say that this certain sheep fell soundly asleep after satiating himself with Christmas dinner.

Well, what better use of a sleeping sheep, but to box him up and send him to Canada for Boxing Day?

I could use the, err, I mean, he could use the vacation.

I wonder what International Priority Mail will cost for a sheep?

Hmmm… perhaps I’ll ship him third class.


Happy Holidays!

Zzzz...
Zzzz...

Twas the night before Christmas, and all were asleep,
Not a creature was stirring, not even Dizzy Sheep.

With a new store and Twelve Days, the week had been busy,
Such festive deals take effort, even for Dizzy.

So with a Baa’aa and a sigh, he snuggled up by the fire,
To ponder the next deal, promotion and super savings flier.

Before long he was snoring and dreaming of yarn,
Stacks of soft fuzziness piled high in his barn.

But then a noise from the roof woke him up from his dream,
Why, it must be Santa Claus, or so it would seem!

Stricken with a panic for he knew it was wrong,
Dizzy had been hungry and now the milk and cookies were gone.

Not a snack was in sight to give jolly Saint Nick,
And in return for a present Dizzy would likely receive an old brick.

Though a turn of events it was someone else making the clamor,
It was just Fred on the roof with his candy cane and hammer.

With a sigh of relief Dizzy returned to relaxing,
Whatever that crazy gargoyle was up to, it wasn’t worth asking.

All cozy and comfortable, soon Dizzy’s eyes began to close,
His mind returning to yarn as he started to doze.

He then thought of his fans who he holds so highly and dear,
And how he hopes they're all well and full of happiness and cheer.

With a smile he managed to mumble in the warm glow of the firelight,
Happy holidays to all, and to all a good night!


On the Twelfth Day of Dizzy

We hope you enjoyed our holiday event!
We hope you enjoyed our holiday event!

On the twelfth day of Dizzy, Dizzy’s deals to me…

Mega super savings,

Something soft and yummy,

Shimmer bits a-glinting,

Fine tweed a-flecking,

Keen objects pointing,

Something soft and flowing,

Many colors stunning,

Acc-cess-o-ries!

Wee bits of lace,

Soft single plies,

Something al-pac-a,

And a great yarn for socks for my feeeeeet!

We hope you enjoyed our holiday savings event! Happy holidays and wooly kisses from everyone at Dizzy Sheep!


On the Eleventh Day of Dizzy

Sigh... Sticky things, the bane of being fuzzy.
Sigh... Sticky things, the bane of being fuzzy.

On the eleventh day of Dizzy, Dizzy’s deals to me…

Something soft and yummy,

Shimmer bits a-glinting,

Fine tweed a-flecking,

Keen objects pointing,

Something soft and flowing,

Many colors stunning,

Acc-cess-o-ries!

Wee bits of lace,

Soft single plies,

Something al-pac-a,

And a great yarn for socks for my feet!

Everyone is enjoying candy canes, but I tend to avoid them. I have a general fear of sticky things, being that I’m so fuzzy. It’s not fun to have things stuck to you, and especially the ripping them out part.

Perhaps it’s all of the festivities, or just my sweet tooth, but Today I’m feeling adventurous! I’m going to try and eat a candy cane without getting it stuck to me.

Alright, take a deep breath. This is very exciting. Just have to make sure I stay focused and… mmm, hey that’s pretty good! Delicious sweet mintiness!

Ow! Wait, no, don’t stick to me. Bad candy cane! Ugh! Oh that’s making it worse. Oh boy.